Premature ejaculation is a form of sexual dysfunction and this could be seen in men and women. For women it could be pain during sex, orgasmic issues, sustenance of orgasm, low libido and the likes. For men, it could be erectile problem, ejaculation disorder, libido disorder, and other dysfunctions.
Premature ejaculation happens when the man ejaculates when he doesn’t want to or when his partner doesn’t want him to. It is also the incapacity of a man to continue or inability to sustain during sex. It is also a situation where a man releases sperm few seconds after penetration. So if you ejaculate within a minutes, it means you are suffering from premature ejaculation.
Premature ejaculation is not necessarily about how many minutes you can last, it is about losing control over your erection. It is about your ability not to climax when you desire.
Why is premature ejaculation a big problem for men?
Erection is very egoistic and men’s sexuality is attached to their ego. So it is the desire of every man to satisfy his woman, make her scream, moan, and not seem to be pretending. Every man loves that feeling of being on top of the world when it comes to sexuality and when a man fails to satisfy his woman, it affects him a whole lot. There is nothing as fulfilling for a man as being able to make love to his woman where he wants it, how he wants it and when he wants it without any erection restriction. Premature ejaculation is subjective, thus men shouldn’t be comparing themselves to those ones that last an hour or so.
Research has shown that premature ejaculation is the number one sexual issue men less than 50 years of age experience. Research also shows that one out of every three men will experience premature ejaculation at a point in their life, so there shouldn’t be a cause for alarm if you experience this.
It is normal for you to experience premature ejaculation sometimes, but should becomes a problem when it happens every time.
Things to look out for to know you have premature ejaculation
1. You always or nearly always ejaculate within one minute of penetration.
2. You do not have the capacity to delay the ejaculation every time you have sex.
3. You feel frustrated and distressed anytime you think about sex and you want to avoid intimacy because you feel you under-perform.
Misconceptions about premature ejaculation
1. If I cannot last more than two minutes then I have premature ejaculation. Research shows that you’re considered to be suffering from premature ejaculation if you can’t last more than one minute, thus two minutes and above is considered okay.
2. People believe the way it is done in the movies is how it should be. Learning how to have sex by watching porn or x rated movies is like learning how to drive by watching fast and furious movie; it does not work that way. We tend to have these images, fantasies and the ideal way about how we should have sex and when it is not done the way we have pictured it, we condemn ourselves.
3. If I cannot make her cum during penetration, I have premature ejaculation. This is a wrong thought as there are about 15% of ladies that reach orgasm by mere kissing, some by grabbing their ass, some by playing with their nipples, some by just touching or by grabbing their boobs. For most women it takes about 10-15 minutes to make them cum and during those minutes the man must be hitting the G spot continuously to make her cum, and for some women it takes a very long time to make them cum, so as a man you shouldn’t be judging your ejaculation by that.
4. My friends can last longer, so should i. You find yourself among your friends talking about how long they last during sex and you begin to compare yourself to them, forgetting the fact that you are different people and what works for A might not work for B.
In conclusion, we are products of our biological make up and our socio-cultural upbringing when it comes to sexuality. A child that was exposed to sexuality at a young age or was being molested could develop high sensitivity to sex when he or she grows, while another child who was properly trained and nurtured as a child could have low sensitivity to sex when he or she becomes an adult, making them two different individuals. So men’s ejaculatory period should not be measured, as we are products of how we were nurtured while growing up. So drink water, pat yourself at the back and tell yourself you are doing great! Having issues with premature ejaculation? Book an appointment with The Fixer HERE